Coaching and the Crab Mentality

There were lots of criticism about a local coach on social media the past couple of days. One of his athletes wrote a long post criticizing him about how badly he was running his coaching business and his compulsive borrowing habits.

This is bad news and would inevitably have implications on the coach-athlete relationship which would in turn compromise the athlete’s growth and performance! Besides, no coach should abuse the trust of their athletes especially given their position of respect and authority (at least most of the time lah…).

It’s not about this coach!

Just to be clear, I’ve got nothing against this coach (just a little bothered that he is not registered with the NROC) and this post isn’t about him. What bothered me enough to write this are the typical response from the coaching fraternity, and a sprinkle of PE teachers, whenever a coach gets into trouble, or when they are doing well for themselves financially.

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Ground Fantasies in Reality

This is somewhat a continuation from the previous post where I ended with the question “Does that mean we should not set big goals and dream big?”

Conventional self-help literature teaches us that we can achieve anything by just thinking positively, and if we are going to think ahead, we might as well think positive and think big!

We are often taught to ignore the cynics, get rid of negative thinking, and to “Dream the Impossible”. Friends or associates who offer pragmatic advice are often labelled as “dream killers” or “haters”.

“The substituting of a kind of ”positive hypnotism” for a previous habit of “negative hypnotism” may appear at least to have short-range benefits, but I have always found that the honeymoon ends all too soon.” – Tim Gallwey, creator of The Inner Game

Ironically, from my experience working with athletes and numerous research studies, “positive thinking” is one of the main culprits that often hinders the progress and potential of athletes.

What the Science Tells us…

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Growth Mindset…Seriously?

No doubt, that the notion of the Growth Mindset has been steadily gaining popularity over the past decade. It’s also has made quite a difference – from improving grades, relationships and helping persons cope better with challenges and stressors.

But popularity has a price – people sometimes distort and oversimplify ideas, and the paybacks are substantially oversold! Not uncommon to hear motivational speakers and “success gurus” (over national radio no less!) spout BS such as anything is possible with the Growth Mindset””, and associating the idea of Growth Mindset to the pseudo-scientific idea of “positive thinking”. Ironically enough, some of these ideas are actually more aligned with the Fixed rather than the Growth Mindset!

“Nobody is going to fault you for not achieving the impossible right?”

Case in point: Many would assume that somebody who screams about Thinking Big and setting out to achieve the impossible as one who is aligned with the Growth Mindset. But let’s pause for a moment and consider this…

If I set an impossible goal and NOT achieve it vs. setting a realistic goal and NOT achieve it, which would make me look stupid?

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