Imagine that you are trying to complete an assignment, learn a skill or to achieve a certain milestone.
The undertaking seems more difficult and requires more effort than you initially assumed.
As a result, you are somewhat frustrated and might be asking yourself one of these questions…
| A | B |
| “Why can’t I get this right?” “Why do I have to do this?” “What have I done wrong?” | “What can I do differently?” “How can I break this down into simpler steps?” “What can I learn from this?” |
What’s the difference between these two groups of questions?
Would you feel and respond differently to questions from group A compared to group B?
What if you are a coach, what sort of questions would you ask your athlete?
Will they resemble questions from Group A – “Why can’t you get this right?” or Group B – “What can you do differently?”
Like most people, you would likely be more cognitive and solution-focused when you ask yourself questions from Group B.
Meanwhile, questions from Group A are likely to compound your frustration. You may even respond defensively when these questions are directed at you.
So what’s responsible for this difference in the way we feel and respond to these questions?
An understanding about how different regions of our brains respond to these questions will give us a better idea!
Coach Hansen 